Letting go and trusting in the natural flow of life: this has been coming up recently in my own life and in clients’ lives too, and it’s at the core of virtually all the work that I do.
Talk to me 5 years ago about this, and it probably would’ve induced a whole lot of anxiety, and I don’t say that lightly. The idea of letting go of anything, or even just loosening my grip – on relationships, career plans, controlling my body – would throw me into a tailspin. That’s because I really truly believed controlling everything in my life was the only way things would go "right".
Spoiler alert: I was totally wrong.
When things didn’t go just as I’d planned or expected, I felt like life was against me, causing me so much stress, anxiety and frustration. From that place, I’d try even harder to control everything in my life, and it was a toxic cycle I spent years wallowing in.
And I know I’m not alone. Trying to control things is part of the human condition, but learning to loosen our grips on control can allow us to get in a more natural flow and trust in the unfolding of life.
One of the most important parts of letting go of control is leaning into and trusting in the natural flow of energy.
Everything is made up of energy. You’re made up of energy, I’m made up of energy, and everything around you is energy. Energy naturally wants to move and transform and flow, but as humans, we… *drumroll please*... try to control it! This control can come in the form of:
Exercising way past your limits so you can be a certain size
Forcing a relationship to work that you know isn’t right
Being extra aware of food intake and strictly adhering to food ‘rules’
When you try to control something, think of it like clamping down on a hose. You’re blocking energy (or in this case – water) from moving and flowing as it wants, which builds up pressure in the hose and it becomes more challenging to keep clamping down (remember, this is like you controlling your life). This is when life can feel "hard" or like "nothing is going right".
But when you let go of the hose, there’s a sense of relief – literally of pressure – and water can once again naturally flow.
When you loosen the grips around your body, in your relationships, your career or something else, that’s when life energy can naturally flow, too.
It’s when people come into your life that help you along your path, coincidences happen, life feels easier and "in the flow". It’s when your body can find its natural shape and life becomes more enjoyable.
Letting go can be scary and uncomfortable – I know that firsthand – but it can also be incredibly freeing.
Trusting in this natural flow of life takes a whole lotta pressure off being human. Whether you call it the Universe, God, Source Energy, Spirit or something else, there’s a greater power at work and when we tap into this deep trust – knowing we’re supported and life is on our side --our experience here on earth can be totally magical.
So where in your life do you feel like you have such a tight grip?
Choose one area or specific situation right now and really feel into it.
In what ways are you holding on so tightly or trying to control this situation?
Is it truly serving you? Supporting you?
What’s ONE thing you can let go of in this situation that would help you feel more peaceful and at ease? Like you just took a deep breathe?
If you’re new to this, start small: how can you loosen your grip on that thing, just a tiny bit?
Write that down and commit to it for the next week.
Then continue to do these small letting go experiments one at a time until you sense greater relief and peace.
Taking small steps is important, especially in the beginning of this practice, because it allows you to collect data to prove to yourself it’s OK to loosen your grip. Once you have that proof that life carries on as you let go of some control, it tends to naturally translate throughout other parts of life.
This week, I challenge you to commit to that one thing you’re letting go of. Easing up on that one thing that’ll help you cultivate a greater sense of peace and calm. Most importantly: get curious with this. If letting go of one thing doesn’t feel "right", try something else. Experiment and see what happens!