You’re never going to please everyone, and that’s amazing news.It's so freeing!
This is true throughout our entire lives, but today let’s look at beauty standards.
There are so many mixed messages around what’s considered “beautiful” right? It changes all the time. Plucked brows, bushy brows, curly hair, straight hair.
It’s the magazines, TV shows, celebrities, etc. that bombard us with the current ideals (which is why I encourage people to detox from this media...more in a future post). These beauty standards also vary based on where you live, your gender, race, sexual orientation and more. So...how are we supposed to keep up?!
With all these factors involved, it’s actually impossible to fit all standards of beauty.
And it's an amazing thing, because we’re all physically different and beautiful in our own right. So why are we trying so hard to fit beauty molds? Let’s pause for a sec and talk about where these beauty standards come from.
People! People just like you and me who decide what’s in and what’s out, what’s “beautiful” and what’s not.
Does this mean beauty standards are made up? Yep. WE give these beauty standards power, but we also have the power to create a different story.
So instead of simply accepting them, I encourage you to question, challenge and reject.
I spent so many years hating on my thighs. They were always too big and too muscular, never thin enough to create a "thigh gap" like celebrities. I'd work out for hours and hours to make them smaller, but I had to be careful not to work out too much because then they'd be more muscular, and that wasn't considered attractive.
UGH, talk about setting myself up for failure!
Finally I realized this is ridiculous. I was giving that "ideal" thigh gap power while trying to fit a beauty mold my body physically couldn't achieve.
I was letting other people dictate if I was happy or not and beautiful or not, and that awareness began to shift everything. What if I choose to like my thighs, exactly as they are?
What would be possible if what you looked like - right here, right now - is considered beautiful? (it is) Would you act differently? Think differently? Dress differently?
Now what would be possible if you tried to please yourself first?
Dressed for you. Wore makeup or not, for you. Worked out or not, for you.
When we come from this place of honoring ourselves first, there’s a natural sense of confidence that tends to grow. It opens up more space for us to choose how we experience our lives instead of letting society dictate what we should and shouldn’t be doing.
Isn’t that freeing?
Rejecting beauty standards probably won’t happen overnight, and that’s OK. It all starts with awareness, then remembering we have the power to choose what we believe.
A great first step is to surround yourself with people who lift you up. Who value you for who you are in your soul, not for what you look like. Who also wish to change the body image conversation.
If you need a safe space to start, join my supportive Facebook community, Body Love Club. We’re all about lifting each other up!